Give a cancer cell an inch…..it will take a mile. My HCG levels were at 78 this week……up from 37 last week. Yuck. I had my time off from chemo treatment and they decided they’d take advantage. It makes me feel better that we’ve switched to a more aggressive treatment though……and that Dr. L is going to be making them more frequent. That means less time for the cancer cells to take advantage of any break time.
I had another day of chemotherapy today. I felt nauseous all morning but I turned a corner about 1pm. I had a great night last night. I watched a few Lifetime movies that I had recorded and fell asleep watching. The last time around I barely slept at all after the large bag of Methotrexate…and ended sleeping on the couch so I could stick my feet under the couch cushions. I learned a trick for restless legs…..slather legs and feet with lotion……peppermint if you can find it. My hubby does it for his RLS too and it works.
Here’s one thing I’ve learned recently…..if you get cancer…..everyone likes to start imposing new rules on you:
Me: I think I’ll just add some Splenda to this.
Lisa: Splenda causes cancer.
Me: I already have cancer.
I love this photo my friend Mollie sent me. It’s Adrien Brody and a Choose Joy bracelet.
Not much else new today. Praying for a good night of sleep and then I’ll wake up to a great new day tomorrow!
You’re doing great! and didn’t fail to make me laugh, as usual! I was going to suggest increasing Vit D to combat the restless legs, but it sounds like you are on it.
so, i started following your blog. stumbled upon it and when i read your entry today i noticed the pic of adrian brody and your friend mollie. she lived near me a few years ago! she is a great girl and it is great to see she is a friend of yours. your blogs are inspirational. hang tuff girl. you are a survivor.
God Bless you Ashley! You are such a light to so many even under the most difficult circumstances. Enjoy those sour patch kids. I love that even in a difficult post, you manage to crack a smile out of me while I’m reading along. Cheering and praying hard for you from down in Austin, TX.
oh man a coffee enema!! hahaha! although i may have given it a try in the past:) and that pic of your friend cracks me up.
You have a very smart Mom…I think you have watched My Love Affair With Cancer or whatever…everything helps. Been praying for you today and believing for sweet sleep for you tonight.
I love th idea of saving your hair for the birds…
Love ya, Beth
Thinking of you! Hoping you have a good night!!
Thanks for the peppermint lotion tip for the RLS. Each night I have to take a hot bath to help mine, but you don’t always have time for a hot bath. Can’t wait to try the peppermint lotion.
Choose joy<3
Ashley…your such an inspiration…such a positive attitude always..cancer doesn’t know what it’s up against when it decided to pick on you! You will be beautiful even when your hair falls out…maybe it will come back totally different too, I have heard of that…curly went straight..straight went curly. I pray or you ashley, and look forward to your blogs. I am going to order some choose joy bracelets…can’t wait to had those out! Love to you and your family…
Ahhhh forgot to tell you my daughter does coffee enemas all the time…just sayin:)
Thank you for the tip on the peppermint lotion! I get RLS and now restless arm syndrome when I’m tired, which is most of the time, at night. My arm one is getting worse now but I think it’s because I work with my hands so much. I will give this a try. Here’s praying you get a good night’s rest!
coffee enema ewwww, I think I would go for the sour patch kids to 🙂 Hope you have a good sleep!
You are going to beat this thing! XOXO
Ohhhh please ditch the crap food including the whole wheat. Cancer cells love sugar. please see an ND that deals in paleo or low carb. Wheat, dairy, and legumes just add to the inflammation. Your body need to heal. I love, love your blog and youre such an inspiration. I am praying for the best for you.
One of my favorite t-shirts seen on a breast cancer survivor- “Of course they’re fake – the reals ones tried to kill me!”
Keep on getting well!
Keep fighting Ashley! I have had soooo much (TOO MUCH) cancer in my family and you are so inspiring. Praying tonight for your good night’s sleep. 🙂 xx
wow. Your such an amazing person. Hugs and prayers
I have no words for how blessed and amazed I am by your words. I am praying for you and cheering you along, for full healing and restoration. God bless you girl, and your family….btw, I’m totally with you on the sour patch kids!
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change ( like when hair falls out), the courage to change the things I can ( damn cancer) and wisdom to know the difference ( fritos+lifetime movie=joy)
Praying everyday:) xoxo
Drink tonic water before bed.. Helps with the leg cramps:)
You inspire me and manage to make me smile,laugh at the same time. You should write a post of reviews on all the Lifetime movies you’ve been watching.
Not much more to say that I think you are great. Thanks for making me smile today.
Liz
I really enjoy your tutorials and ideas… But even more I enjoy your attitude and willingness to share! Hang in there:)
I hate that you’re having to go through this!
thats cool about the restless leg syndrom thing, but i think lotion might get expensive. my dad got RLS after radiation therapy and months and months in the hispital…in a bed about a foot too short for his legs [they dangled, even after the bed extension.] anyway, he uses a bar of soap to treat his RLS…just stick a bar of soap at the foot of the bed [the bottom corner on the side you sleep on is best since the corners are tighter and the soap travels less there] underneath the bottom [fitted] sheet. he says it works and he got the idea from other people who say is works and if you google it youll find other testimonies about it working, though WHY it works is a mystery. i just thought id let you know since any bar soap will do and hotel soaps are free, or you can get bar soap for like 33 cents each at walgreens when the three packs go on sale for a buck. lol. some say it looses its effectiveness after a few months, but its been 8+ months and my dads bar of soap is still working for him. 🙂 anyway, good luck and kill that cancer! oh, and dont stand in front of the microwave. 😉
Hi Ashley! Everyday I’m inspired by you to live life to it’s fullest. I think the hummingbirds who are building nests with your hair are very thankful. and I believe they are going to help you in return. Hummingbirds are a special spirit. I think the hummingbirds at you house are a good thing. They symbolize Joys and Life. A symbol for accomplishing what seems impossible and will teach you in finding the miracle of joyful living from your own life circumstances. Your a fighter Ashley and I BELIEVE you’re going to kick this cancers BUTT!!
your grocery list made me giggle!
keep smiling and staying positive!
Ashley- I’m praying for you. You are amazing and remarkable. I can only imagine how hard this is to go through for you. Much love your way.
Yes to Fritos! Fritos and chocolate milk was my antidote to post surgery and post chemotherapy nausea. Also, a seam ripped takes care of that hair tapped around the vacuum roller. It works fast and without scratching the roller.
Seam ripper. (Autocorrect does a lousy job of reading my mind.)
ok, so coffee enema? Huh? I know what an enema is but I just had to google it 🙂 Thanks for all of your inspiration and for making me laugh! Prayers are with you and your family always.
So my Meme had colon cancer about 15 years ago and my mom and her sisters were constantly doing everything they could to add to her treatment. There was a tea she had to brew and steep for 12 hours and store in dark glass bottles. There were vitamins and herbs. My other aunt gave her a joint {as if my Meme would actually smoke it} it was insane. It gave them something else to focus on instead of the thought that their mother had cancer. She would go to the oncologist and tell him all the crazy things they were doing for her and she’d tell him that her kids were curing cancer using the internet.
Your mom loves you.
Tell her to keep those coffee enemas to herself though.
Sending you so many good thoughts.
You are truly an amazing person, you are in my prayers.
When I lost my hair to chemotherapy for breast cancer, I decided to shave it all off because I could not stand the hair all over. I had an infant at the time and the last straw for me was finding hair stuck to the nipple of her bottle 🙁 But what I discovered was that the little roots left actually tingled and poked and felt more uncomfortable on my head than the hair itself. As crazy as this sounds, I finally took duct tape to my entire head–it was quite a sight, my head all wrapped in silver–and pulled all the little stubble bits off. It felt much better then.
Many many prayers to you. Cancer is a beast.
Sounds like you could use a hug today. Maybe a laugh? I have a really funny, really disturbing cancer story for you. My bestie Laura lost her eye to cancer. Her boys didn’t know about her glass eye. One day she was standing in the kitchen and sneezed. Her eye flew out and rolled under the fridge!! The boys saw this and ran to see what it was. She was trying to hold them back and get this out from under the fridge before they realized that it was her eye all the while laughing. Too late… her older son started screaming “You’re an alien”. She called me and we laughed until we cried. Hope you get a chuckle out of her story. 🙂
Too funny!! Bless her heart!
Thinking and praying for you and your family! I ran across your blog by accident. I saw your joy bracelet on someone from Palm Desert and looked into your blog. I am from La Quinta, CA, so it peaked my interest. My thoughts are with you every day. Both my grown boys had brain tumors and recovered well. So I know what your mom is going through… My heart goes out to you all.
Praying for a good night’s rest and for peace for you tonight!
Go far, far away cancer!!
….you’ll have to try that coffee enema just so you can blog about it! 😉 xoxo!
You never fail to make me laugh and as I’ve said before THAT is one of your best medicines, keep your sense of humor. I’ve heard of the coffee enemas, I’m thankful my mom didn’t run across them when I was taking chemo! Thank God for mommies, mine never failed to make it easier when I was sick. I’m am soooo sorry you have RLS, it is a crappy feeling! My grandmother had it, my mom has it and my brother. Mine hasn’t been as bad as theirs but there have been times I wanted to climb the walls. I hadn’t thought of lotion but I have used Aspercreme on my legs when it was being particularly annoying. The hair issue is hard, my friend who is going thru chemo right now has lost her hair and it’s growing back in. She’s been having issues with the itch of hair regrowth but it’s getting better. Hang in there, you’re inspiring so many with your attitude and honesty!
I always look forward to your updates and just shared it with the whole fam. You make us all laugh and love you more!
You’re such a gem! I’m sure that you do have tough times and it’s not all sunlight and rainbows like it seems on your blog, but still, your positive attitude is just amazing. Seriously, you’re ever donating your lost hair to the hummingbirds!
Have you taken any of your Choose Joy bracelets to the hospital with you when you’re getting your chemo? Maybe some of your fellow patients could use the reminder to choose joy? 🙂
I’m praying you have a good night of sleep, too. I love that you are giving the birds your hair. I hope when I brush my corgie that the birds will gather his fur and have a warm, cozy nest. I’m sure they’d love to have those long soft strands of yours!
I. Love. Sour. Patch. Kids. And using excessive amounts of punctuation 🙂
You are Choosing Joy today. Thank you for being so inspiring.
You have to read: Antincancer:A New Way of Life…It’s so informative on how diet DOES effect cancer. I listened to it on cd in the car and then bought the book for reference. Hang in there!!
ha! can you imagine rolling up to starbucks and being like, “I brought my own container for my coffee”, and then throwing an enema bag up on the counter? I need to buy some choose joy bracelets and then stalk some celebrities.
Most people who go through something like this don’t have even a tenth of the JOY you choose to exude, Ashley. Thanks for always being a blessing to others when you don’t have to. You’re amazing. Really.
Good diet is probably helpful, but if you are nauseous eat what your body will allow you to eat. Eating is better than not eating. Small meals often can help. My husband had cancer over twenty years ago and made a full recovery. He couldn’t stand bread; it tasted burnt. A brother with cancer found that ramen noddles were about all that he could eat.
Yes! My experience exactly. And meat tastes like metal. Barbeque sauce went a long way in helping me to get it down.
Thinking about you tonight.
Your giving others so much. Thank you.
Holly
I think you are a brave, brave woman. Thank you for the example you set for others facing difficulty or illness – to keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep going, be positive and hopeful. xxx
Awesome attitude! You are right on!! Keep it up and you’ll kick this stuff!
I was wondering why you were not on weekly treatments. SO glad you are now! I did E and A on one Thursday, went home with M in a 12 hour pump, went in on Friday to have pump removed and get E and A again. The following Thursday I’d get C and O. So my schedule was Th/F- Th, Th/F-Th, etc. Even when I was SO sick and weak, and my Neutrophils were at .02, my ONC went forward with chemo- his motto was NO break, this stuff is SO aggressive…taking a break is like taking a step back. It took 3 full treatments (6 weeks) to get from 70,000 to under 5. Then it c.r.e.p.t down each week. I did the 3 full treatments (another 6 weeks) as protocol says, and my numbers after my final treatment was .32. A month later, receiving NO chemo, my Beta HCG was “less tha .10” which is the lowest reading possible….and I’ve been there for 5 months now!!
YOU will get there too! Keep on keeping on.
A few things (tips maybe):
Even when you don’t feel like it- EAT something while at chemo. (String cheese, yougurt (I liked frozen go-gurts), applesauce, etc.)
Use baking soda toothpaste, it will help avoid mouth sores. (They HURT!!)
If you start feeling tingly (like you’re gonna sneeze, but it hurts), during the drip of “O”, have them slow the drip. I finally realized the connection after 3rd administration….then was told it is a side effect, and slowing down the drip helps!
If you find yourself getting headaches after chemo, have them slow down your anti nausea drips…pumping them too fast can make you have a headache later.
You may find yourself at the point that you don’t want to eat anything…especially after that big old bag of M (that one did me in!!), eat whatever you crave…..who cares if all it is, is a bag of Sour Patch Kids? It’s calories! I went through tubs of ice cream!
Baby Oil is AWESOME for the bald head! Mine kinda ‘hurt’ a little as the hair was falling out, and after. I described it as the feeling you get after you take out a pony tail that has been in all day. A dab of Baby Oil, smoothed all over before bed, was nice!
For Boo, there is a GREAT book out there called “The Good-Bye Cancer Garden” by Janna-Matthies. My 6 year old daughter found it at the library and we checked it out a few times, and read it over and over. It’s about breast cancer, but fits pretty good.
Anyway- Stay strong!! Remember, it’s gonna get harder as you go along…let those that love you help! Rest as much as you can!
Keep choosing JOY!!
With Love,
Heather Clark (a caring reader of your blog that has recently been on this 1 in 40,000 people journey)…and I too…Choose JOY!! 😉
You make me laugh. You are such a blessing to so many people. More than you’ll ever know. You are truely living out your fathers legecy of “choose joy”.\
God Bless you Ashley
You should Google Jim Stynes, he’s a former AFL football player undergoing cancer treatment. He’s a big believer of coffee enemas! xx
Hey Ashley. I thought of you while watching the news this morning, I know you have been having trouble with Boo adjusting to your hair loss. These Moms are trying to make a Bald and Beautiful barbie to help thier daughters adjust! Here is the link, just thought it might be something you would like to see.
https://www.facebook.com/BeautifulandBaldBarbie?sk=wall
ps I love your blog, and amazed at your strength!
I’m with your mom on this one Ashley! I’d be harping and caring and imposing and trying to make sure everything was safe, safe, safe for you! If I caught you with the sour patch kids, I would just smile a knowing smile and give you a hug though. 🙂 Love the pic with the bracelet. Awesome! Are you coming up with all sorts of cute hat patters for when you finally decide to cut your lovely locks? Then again, you live where it’s much warmer than here so perhaps you’ll opt to tan your noggin. Hugs and love and prayers sent for you and your battle.
You are a rock star Ashley. Sharing your journey is the best gift I can imagine. I know there are so many out there facing similar situations and your humor and grace are refreshing.
Thanks for the RLS tip—I’ll have to try it. I like the idea of choose joy photos with celebrities. I saw Sylvester Stallone a bit back and I wish I had my bracelet then! I would love an adult Choose Joy T shirt!
Ashley…you are amazing and have such grace! I just found your blog, and I am now following you here and on Pinterest… XoXo
Ashley…or should I say Super Human!- I know you get a million comments stating how you are such an inspiring woman and how your blog is wonderful! well, consider me your 100,000,001 person to tell you how amazing you are! I went through a miscarriage in 2010 and didn’t have a tenth of your strength, I stumbled upon your Blog and now I can’t start the day with out reading your posts! You give me such stregth! You need to know that you have touched so many lives! Even to a lot of people that I am sure have never commented! You are in my prayers! And please get those sour patches! A very wise doctor told me there are reasons our bodies crave certain foods…Listen to your cravings! Give Boo a squeeze and have a great day!
So sorry to hear your numbers are up but stay positive especially with the new chemo plan but I know you already are! Praying for you and your family!
I just came across your blog because I saw one of your wonderful projects online. After looking at the tutorial I clicked on the most recent post. Wow, what a positive outlook! My prayers are with you. Thanks for all the great projects and inspiration (crafting AND more importantly life)!
you’re so…positive! i don’t know if i would be that way..probably not. reminds me to be greatful for my simple life!
green smoothies!! ..if you can keep them down 🙂
Fight! Fight! Fight!!!
I love to see how positive you are, this is also helping fight cancer. And Boo taking care of you remembering the rules is so lovely…
The hummingbirds will be so comfortable in their nests! I think they will come at your window to thank you in person! 🙂
I see it was already suggested, but I use tonic water for my RLS. There is also a homeopathic “medicine” called restless legs by Hyland, both of these have quinine which has been shown to be effective in treating RLS. (This was also suggested by my doctor.) I usually drink the tonic with some lime, and perhaps some gin, again, as “prescribed” by my doctor, but it works just as well plain!
I love your blog, Ashley- and I am praying for you in Nashville, TN!
I know you are very crafty and can sew yourself, but I wanted to offer you a chemo hat! I make them from my step-moms pattern and give them to women going thru chemo. If you would like one, please just email me! They are free and ship for free too! I am also on facebook search Madelyn Hats.
~Melissa
Hey Ash, two things…
1-You are in Samster’s & my nightly prayers
2- I’ve tried everything I can find to help with RLS and here’s one more to add to your trick book, a heating pad. I have a small one that I put under my calves, I turn it on & set the timer so it goes off on it’s own after I fall asleep. Yes, I suppose electrical blankets may not be the safest but I figure if it’s a tiny one maybe it’s ok. Just thought I’d pass the tip along…’crazy legs’ will make you, well, crazy!
Best to you…
Coffe Enemas!?! Run, run fast. Your knew those restless legs would come in handy for something!
Seriously, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family but you must know how much better you and your blog make my day too so it goes both ways ;o)
You are an awesome woman! Sending positive thoughts your way 🙂
Hello, fellow-Choose-Joy!-woman!!
How is it possible for Moms to get more Mom-ish all the time??!
You and your Mom are priceless!
Thank you for my Joy of the day!
Patricia
Choose Joy!
You are doing great!
My MIL is battling cancer for the third time (her and three of her sisters have all had cancer, her’s and one of her sisters keeps coming back) That particular sister is a doctor who researched and now will not wear makeup, use any chemicals on her body (she buys all natural soaps and what not) she won’t wear perfume, nail polish, or anything else…she’s gone PSYCHO!!! She lectures my MIL about eating healthy (all organic of course), not drinking LA tap water (like anyone would!?!?!?) and all those other things your mom bugs you about. Familial love! I had to draw the line when she started lecturing me about giving my kids soda (sprite!!!, and not even diet mind you!) I told her when breathing LA’s toxic air quit causing cancer I’d worry about my kids soda intake…rude I know, but she pushed way too far.
Stay strong!
Trying to catch up on reading your blogs…very funny, but of course your mom is just doing what all mom’s do! No matter how old our babies get, they are still our babies! Love ya, Cousin Vicki
You are seriously a doll. My dad is shaving his head next week before his stem cell transplant. I am sorry you are losing all of your beautiful hair. I am praying for you and sending hugs and positive choose joy vibrations. More advice – which I know you have plenty of!! If you are drinking distilled water – take a mineral supplement to replace minerals. And blackstrap molasses can help with restless leg! It sounds like your lotion is awesome too. Hugs!
January 13, 2012…All week,Boo had been upset that you were going to shave your head. I kept trying to comfort her that it was not a big deal. How could I prove it? I shaved my head this day to help her. Of course, she cried hysterically when she saw me, but was fine when you had your head shaven.
I am so glad you made the “Rite of Passage” video to save this poignant and memorable time. Over a year later, you are still cancer free…praise the Lord.
Let’s keep up the coffee enemas, distilled water, lots of greens, beans, onions,berries and seeds as Dr. Joel Fuhrman prescribes, prayers and quiet time with the Lord, deep belly laughs, lavender epsom salt baths in extra hot water, affection, singing praises to the Lord and praising each other. I love you forever, mom