We made it to church 2 weeks in a row. I was determined to go today to pray especially for my friend Staci and her mother Elaine and their family. Elaine collapsed this past weekend from a stroke and while they were doing scans they found a lesion on her lung and several on her lymph nodes that they believe to be cancerous.
The night my surgery went sideways, Ben showed up almost immediately at the hospital, no hesitation. Staci follows up almost every day on my progress. Elaine has brought over my favorite drinks, antioxidant soup, and “smooth move” tea….anything she could do to make my day easier the last few weeks. Elaine’s husband Fred showed up on my doorstep to help contact any cancer center I wanted to get in to. Staci and her husband Ben were the first ones to make the Choose Joy bracelets for us……they started the whole thing. They would never want me to give credit though. Well, guess what Ben and Staci: you are now responsible for over 10,000 Choose Joy bracelets floating around to date…and 4,000 more that have yet to be shipped out. Yesterday, Elaine told Staci to make sure I knew that she was wearing her Choose Joy bracelet in the hospital. I couldn’t help but cry. Today Elaine is MY inspiration.
Today’s sermon at church was on Psalm 46: God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
Don’t judge….but I’m a reality TV junkie…..and all I could think about in church during the sermon was last week’s Jersey Shore episode where Vinny gets a new tattoo:
His roommates have no idea what the meaning is: Let Go, Let God…..huh, what? I know, I know….I’m using Jersey Shore to make a point…..but the tattoo is exactly what Psalm 46 says: Be still, and know that I am God. Be still…..in other words, “let go” and let God handle it. I learn more and more everyday that most things are out of my control….and I have to let God fill in: whether it’s healing, faith, guidance, and especially acceptance. So how do I choose joy in situations where most people would think there isn’t an ounce of joy to be found? I just let go……and have faith. It doesn’t mean that I don’t cry, or that I’m not sad, or disappointed when things happen…..but I can choose not to be bitter or angry. There’s a huge difference. It’s hard to put into words…..so I hope that makes sense.
****
After church we went to lunch at our favorite lunch place and I watched as Boo inched precariously closer and closer to falling into the fountain. She was on a mission to save a “rock” which I swore was either going to turn out to be dog poop or tree bark….but it did actually turn out to be a rock. A floating pumice rock.
Watching Armageddon this afternoon….Brett says that I remind him of Steve Buscemi. Yes, the goofy, creepy guy. I hope it’s just the sarcastic humor
Don’t worry about the spiritual analogy from Jersey Shore – my roommates & I constantly found those types of things while watching the Harry Potter movies 🙂 If it brings you closer to God, who cares what the source is?
Thanks 4 sharing! Our prayers also to Elaine & her family…
You are completley and totally awesome 🙂 I love reading your post and am always so inspired by you.You and yours are in my thoughts and prayers.
Psalm 46, my favorite verse, maybe because I have a hard time…letting go. 😉 I’m praying for Elaine also!
You’re an inspiration, thank you!
Wrap that giant doughnut in fabric!
love your blog ..tears & cheers !!!
Oooooo jersey shore!!! But that is such a powerful saying. Go vinny!!! Prayers for your dear friend. Choose joy!
Aren’t donuts kind of a gooey mess themselves?!
adding Elaine to my prayers.
So glad to hear you’re feeling well enough to go to church… I will be adding your friend to my prayers. Love ya, Beth
awww, Vinnie has always been my favorite! PRaying for you guys and your friends!
Praying for you Ashley! Did you try that Krylon spray paint meant for plastic?
Try the universal paint that is supposed to be good for use on anything, wood, vinyl, glass, plastic, you name it…the donuts look cute though.
Stay strong
Hola Ashely, incluiremos en nuestras oraciones a Elaine y todo saldra segun los planes de Dios.
Un beso!
Praying for Elaine! I think people don’t see God in the little things of life often. I think so often we make Him out to be this big far off Being who isn’t involved with daily life… I think it is awesome that you can see God in Jersey Shore… I mean… God points us to Him so many ways, and I am glad you got to draw closer to Him through that. I am also glad you got to go to church. It is nice to fellowship with believers.
Praying for you and her, and I am sure you are a blessing to her just as much as she was to you.
Also- You both have very good men. Good job men! So often there are examples of bad men in our culture and I think you both have two very good ones.
-Evelyn.
Thanks for the great post. Elaine will be in my prayers too.
My husband loves watching the same movies over and over again and Armageddon is one of them. It’s so bad it’s good.
Favorite lines: “What are you doing with a gun in space?” and
“I liked to shake the hand of the daughter of the bravest man I’ve ever met.”
Least romantic love scene ever Ben Afleck and Liv Tyler with the animal crackers.
I love that movie!!! 🙂
so addicted to reality tv too! i hate that i love it so much, but i can’t tear my eyes away!
i love that saying vinny got – very powerful!
praying for you, your friends and their mom.
ps-i love instagram pics and am still learning the ropes! i have captured so much more now that i have an iphone! love that i don’t always have to lug around the big daddy camera with me!
…sounds like you had a good day. glad to hear it….
What photo app do you use to take/edit your photos! They are amazing!
Instagram 🙂
My favorite is Matthew chapter 8 verse 20?-30? storm at the sea..(Depending on the bible version)…when Jesus say “quiet, be still” calms the sea, then turns to the disciples and says yea who have such little faith. I have those 3 words tattoo’d on my right wrist as a daily reminder to trust in my faith of the lord, no matter how bad times may seem he’ll carry me through. It’s that scripture which calms my heart and soul and makes me want to live the best life I can, yet accept what I can not control.
My prays go out to you, your family, and your friends family.
Awh, prayers for your friends and their mom!!
Those donuts actually look good – not a craft fail. Also, I hope you don’t remind him of Steve Buscemi in Boardwalk Empire 🙂
prayers & good thoughts for you & your friend’s family. thank you for your reminders to Choose Joy.
xoxo Ashley! Praying for Elaine and her family too!! What wonderful friends you have!
Your post is just another confirmation to what I’ve already heard today. Let go and let God…..easier said than done but I sure as heck am trying! Thanks.
I TOTALLY get you…in so many ways…and I don’t even KNOW you!!! Cancer Sucks…Let Go, Let God…praying for others as you are fighting…you are amazing! Keep it up!
awwww i pray for your sweet friends, ashley.
let go; let god. such powerful words. sometimes easier said then done for a lot of us. i always remember something my daughter told me when i was having a rough patch thru the lovely walk of life, “if god brought you to it, he will bring you thru it”…i think she was only 17 at the time….i smile when i recall our conversation, but it is soooo true. we have to trust in the lord. he knows what he is doing.
blessings! i hope you enjoyed the rest of your sunday funday! xo
Add me to the people praying for Elaine and family. Hope she recovers soon. Where do you find such amazing friends? They sound delightful. Sure hope it’s either not cancerous, or that she can recover soon. And, you too!
A donut party? Oh, that’s my kind of party.
I’ve never seen Jersey Shore. Cool that the guy got a tattoo like that.
I stumbled across your website a few days ago and I am hooked! You are a total inspiration to me. I have had a challenging year, as I lost my husband one year ago this week to a heart condition we did not know he had. Sometimes it’s hard to see how I will ever move forward, but your positive words make me realize I should appreciate all that I have and be strong. Let go; Let God is my new motto 🙂
So nice to hear about your lovely Sunday. Hard to put in to words what you mean to me…(that sounds weird) but I know you know….
You are amazing and such an inspiration. Thank you. Thank you for who you are and for sharing yourself so openly. You make me believe. Xo praying (in my own way….not church) for you!!! Much love to you and yours…
Ashley – don’t know if you even remember me, we were pledge sisters at Wake. 🙂 I just want you to know that I have been praying for you and your precious family. I cannot even express to you what an inspiration you are to me and others. I find myself checking your blog every single day – you are contagious! God is good, and I know that He will provide for you and your family. thank you for your words – they are such a gift. We have a dear friend in Charlotte across the street who is dealing with a brain tumor, and I want to share your blog with him! Surely it will provide him comfort and encouragement. You are an amazing woman. Keep up the good work!
tip: theres lawn furniture spray paint that bonds at the molecule-level with plastic. maybe you could try that? its by krylon, available at hardware stores and MAYBE walmart. 🙂
Prayers for your wonderful Elaine and your dear, supportive friends. I just don’t understand all these people that I know or have heard of that have been diagnosed with lung cancer! I am sorry for her!
I am really glad to hear that you felt well enough to go to church and out to eat! Lil Boo looks so cute hanging over the edge of the fountain.
Hugs, Ashley!
YOU. ROCK.
The minute I saw the title of your post I thought about Jersey Shore too and then I thought there was no way you would watch Jersey Shore. Thank you Ashley for sharing my addiction (and admitting it!) And how could the roommates not know what that means? I just felt bad for them… Praying that you will have a great week and that the new chemo is kicking cancers butt!
Prayers to Elaine! I love the doughnut party theme! My kiddo wants me to create a tiered doughnut cake for her birthday party. Maybe just make a whole doughnut fiesta.
Did you try Krylon plastic spray paint? It just my ‘dough’ the trick… 😉
might* ‘dough’ the trick…still giggling
I absolutely LOVE that you used Jersey Shore (even though I have never even seen an episode) to make your point. I think you make our Father in Heaven very proud because you meet people where they are. I am praying for Elaine, her family, you, and your family! Always in my heart! Thanks for allowing God to use you to reach people that otherwise may not have ever been reached 🙂
Funny..First of all, I heart jersey shore and i probably wouldve thought the same thing about Vinnys tat if our sermon were on that. Second, i also heart Steve Buscemi. Last, i will pray for Elaine and her family.I have been praying for you and your beautiful family as well. God is sovereign.
I am reading this after just coming home from the viewing service of a dear friend who just passed after a hard fight with cancer. When I got to the psalms verse u posted I had to cry….. I found out tonight that my friend chose a passage from psalms to be read at her funeral. I am touched by you every time I read your posts. My friend was like you, she kept smiling she choose joy. We were looking at pictures of her from when she was sick and I am sure in pain but not a single one shows it there is a smile on her face in every one. I am going to order some choose joy bracelets as soon as I can but I want to tell you thank you! Thank you for showing us the good and the bad of who you are for showing that even in a chemo chair you are smiling but thank you most of all for teaching me to choose joy. I am hoping I will get to be part of an online celebration of life that you should have when you are better! Thank you, choose joy!
I had a crazy dream about you and your family last night. I dreamed that you were making Choose Joy bracelets that were leather with beading and some kind of feathers hanging off them that you wrapped many times around your wrist. I dreamed that you were healed and had built some crazy house/ranch with horses and I was your assistant or something I think. Well I am not sure what any of this means, but I guess the bottom line is that your blog is such a huge part of my day that I even dream about you.
p.s I posted your Choose Joy button as the background image on the computers at my office and it seems to be having a positive effect on my coworkers:)
Be well.
i love that you explained that letting go and giving things up to God doesn’t mean you can’t cry… some people think that all emotions are taken away when God takes over… its not that, He still lets us experience life, but supports us, helps us shoulder the burden that life brings us…
i’m so sorry your friend is going through that, we are praying for her recovery and God’s guidance for her family and friends as they all go through it together…
Praying for Elaine and her family. My mom had a major stroke 4 1/2 years ago and she had 2 smaller ones this past year. It is so hard to watch her struggle. She is only 75! Hers affected speech, memory and processing. So, i know some of the things to pray. After reading your post, i thought about this that i saw at a friend’s house last friday. “Good Morning. This is God. I’ll be taking care of your problems today. I do not need your help. Have a good day. I love you!” Isn’t that AWESOME. I should have that tattooed somewhere, except i’m 46 and extremely afraid of what sagging tattoos are gonna look like when i’m old and droopy! Praying for you Ashley.
XO, love this post Ashley.
Thanks for the verse, need to be reminded of that constantly. I’m so happy you were able to make it out today!! 🙂 praying for elaine and you of course 🙂 hope you have a good night!
Adding Elaine to my daily prayers. Re. Steve Buscemi – maybe Mr. LBB just thins of you are a super-smart horn-dog, LOL. Just sayin’. . .
I knew immediately what your post would include just by reading the title! (Jersey Shore! Weekly-car-wreck-I-can’t-help-but-look-at television!)
I thought it was odd, though, that none of them knew what Vinny’s tattoo meant. I mean, not a clue at all, nor even a guess. I thought that was a little sad. Of course, I moved on from that to enjoy the rest of the mindlessness!
Thinking of you in every ray of light…
One of my favorite verses, I love David”s trust in God our sermon here today was also about David and letting God take over. You inspire me to Choose Joy I will keep you and your loyal friends in my prayers. You keep going with that sweet smile 🙂
“You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in you.”
That’s my resolution…Let Go and Let God!! I will be praying for Elaine and her family as well as continued prayers for you. (By the way… I’m from NJ originally and I absolutely hate Jersey Shore! You say you’re addicted to that show but UGH! They are so stupid!!) Just giving my 2 cents, and that plus a dollar can’t even by a good doughnut 🙂
What an encouraging post! Seems you have things in perspective. That can’t be easy to do all the time. Praise God for blessing you with peace and contentment, optimism, joy and wonderful friends!(Also, my favorite line from Armageddon comes from Owen Wilson: “Scariest environment imaginable. That’s all you had to say. Scariest environment imaginable.”
Girl that verse is what gets me through MOST days in my own life right now. But I don’t complain about my situations, I just pray. God knows how much we can handle as well as our limits’. So I have faith in that. I trust. I believe. Sometimes that’s ALL we have. I have seen LOTS of miracles in the last 6 months with my own eyes so the POWER OF PRAYER WORKS. Long story short, my step-dad was struck by a van on his motorcycle coming home from work. Lost his leg at the scene, broke front & back pelvis, torn abdomin, amongst other life-threatening injuries as he obviously was thrown from his bike. He escaped without ANY head trauma – just a bump. We almost lost him 3x in the hospital. They had to do emergency surgery to save his life & he loses his colon during the surgery to save him. He had already lost enough & then the colon too. We all were in disbelief but not him. This man chooses JOY everyday. He is the sweetest man & does not have an enemy in the world. When we kept saying “why did this happen to you” . . .he would reply “why not”. Are you serious? His faith is amazing especially after losing a limb, colon, broken bones & so many other things he has to deal with now. WHY am I telling you all this? Because every dr. said they had NO IDEA how he is here, how he survived the initial accident. But I DO! God saved his life. Miracles happen. They DID happen & they continue to happen with him & they WILL happen with YOU my friend. You are on the right track. Hold tight to that faith on all those days when you feel down of feel like YOU alone can’t get through. You worry about the day-to-day stuff (the little things) and then you turn the rest over to God because He’s got this! He WILL cure you. The road may not be the quickest or the easiest but He is using you for His glory & you will be so much stronger in the end – trust me! I have witnessed it all too well, just keep believing . . . .your time is coming! =) Stay strong my friend – I am here for ya! xoxo
I couldn’t agree more. There is comfort in giving all your troubles over to Him and allowing Him to be in control. You are in my prayers!
There is a spray paint specifically for plastics (made by Krylon, I think). You may want to give it a shot if it isn’t what you already tried. Good luck!
I love that you inspired Boo’s party. My 4 year old daughter is very similar in that respect, and I love that they like to impress us. Such sweet girls 🙂
That is it! That is what I have learned too. “Let go and let God handle it”. I don’t follow a religion. I first heard this when I was going through my divorce.
It is a hard thing to explain. I have never been able to, But I get it. Let go of the fear, we can be afraid but it’s wasted energy. Energy better spent on “Joy”.
Hugs from Canada…Jo
You are a joy and an encouragement!
Elaine is my dear friend and it made my heart less heavy to read your positive words. I know with all of us in her corner she will back with us in no time. My thoughts are with you and your family too.
Okay, I checked, there is about 40 posts telling you to use plastic spray paint… My question is did it work? 🙂
Oh Lord,
grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
AMEN!!!!
It’s so hard for us to get out of the Lords way and let Him do what He’s so good at. He always has the best in store for us! But we still always seem to try to make deals with Him or think we know better. LOL! Maybe one of these days we’ll get it right. Glad He loves us in spite of it!
LOTS of prayers coming your way for you and your family. And your friends!
Thank you for being so brutally honest about your journey! It makes us realize what’s truly important!!
Ashley, I also say it’s hard to say what you mean to me, but I get so much out of reading your posts. I also am praying in my own way for you and your friends. You both are lucky to have each other. Thank you in so many ways.
You remind me EVERYDAY tp choose JOY Ashl;ey – even a bazillion miles away in Australia… Love to you from Down Under! xx
You all need to get Arnie the Doughnut, by Laurie Keller – perfect book for a donut party! Then again, after reading it, you might not want to eat the donuts…
Ashley ~ My daughter, son-in-law and Ben & Staci went to college together. I am so shocked to hear about Elaine. You wrote a beautiful testimony to Faith. I’d like to order some “Joy” bracelets. Praying for you and Elaine. Nanci Asaro, Carmichael, CA
Last night I had some trouble sleeping, and first, I prayed that the Lord would help me get back to sleep. Then, I wondered if I was having trouble sleeping for a reason. So then I prayed that He would reveal if there was someone I should be praying for while I was trying to go back to sleep. You popped into my head immediately. Know that many strangers are praying for the Lord’s healing! I’m also praying that He will draw you and your family near to Him. *hugs*
Thanks for this post – I have been trying to choose joy myself lately, and I also need to Let Go, Let God. It all comes in his time and way.
Praying for you and your family, and Elaine & family. 🙂
yes, I am so trying to learn that. my husband is in recovery and that’s a huge part. Thinking of you often. and that made me giggle that your mr. compared you to steve buscemi
They have mylar donut balloons on ebay… you could just blow them up with regular air.
Thanks for your honesty on this journey. Praying for you and your family.
I love the relation to jersey shore and I think you should totally get that tattooed on your head too:) You truly are an inspiration!
So I was just cutting an apple for my 3 year old and it made me think of Boo’s doughnut party. (that makes me sound so creepy) Anyways, I cored the apple first and then cut in into thin slices. Then I spread some peanut butter over the top and sprinkled them with granola. They look like sprinkled covered doughnuts! They would be such a cute (and healthy) snack for Boo’s doughnut party.
I hope you are having a good day today:)