Archives for 2012

Photo of the Day: A Haircut

January 14, 2012 by Ashley Hackshaw

My mom came home from some errands yesterday and I thought something looked different…..she shaved her head! She didn’t want me to do it by myself. I had planned to shave mine this morning because I was so tired of finding hair all over the house. Boo was really upset that Grandma shaved her head….she cried for about an hour….but she eventually came around and then wanted a scarf like Grandma’s to wear. So sweet. I think my mom looks awesome with a shaved head:

This morning we got up early, went and ate breakfast at our favorite place and then met my friend Tara at the salon. Tara’s friend Katie took some video. My friend Taili Song Roth came to take photos. Here’s a sneak peek…..me and my niece Courtney are now twins. Boo shaved my head until her hand got tired:

It wasn’t bad at all! I kind of like this look….although I think I look a little like a mall mannequin. Boo can’t wait to take me to share day so everyone can sign my head.

I’ve got eyes in the back of my head now:

Photo of the Day: The Cross

January 13, 2012 by Ashley Hackshaw

Isn’t this beautiful? I went on a walk with my mom this morning to get some Vitamin D. I think all that juicing gave me a burst of energy. Almost to the top of the mountain is a large metal cross….and it’s lit up every night so you can see it for miles. My friend Mollie hikes to the top and leaves Choose Joy bracelets…..she sends me texts when she is up at the top…..I need binoculars so that I can wave to her. The Choose Joy bracelets disappear when she leaves them. I love that. I’ll be back up there some day soon leaving my own bracelets for others to take.

The last time I walked around our neighborhood I was trying to stretch out my ligaments……not knowing that the pain was a tumor growing through my uterus. I thought I was pregnant and I’d sneak a glance of my growing belly in the windows of the stores on El Paseo. I remember thinking that my belly was growing much faster than I thought it should. It took so much effort to get out of bed and even to sit up straight in a chair. Walking seemed to make it feel a bit better…..so I’d force myself to walk every morning. Eventually we’d learn that there was no baby…..and I’d get painkillers to help me through the day. I would have never believed that I would have an hysterectomy or be diagnosed with cancer. Of course I also thought my dad would live to be 104 years old….and why not, his grandmother lived to be 104…..and she was the checker champion at her nursing home too. Never in a million years. I truly thought I was invincible. Funny how God can humble you in a second.

I was sitting in chemo the other day and a young woman was there for her first time and I was overhearing her anxiety. I kind of sat in my own little world for a bit thinking that I didn’t have the energy to talk to anyone at that moment….with my blinders on. I looked over across the room and she looked kind of hesitantly at me, like maybe I wasn’t so friendly, and that’s all it took for me to give her a huge smile back. That’s all it takes. Just a smile…..and then a “how are you?” It’s not that hard. Make eye contact. Be friendly. Smile. Spread joy.

Mission Healing

January 12, 2012 by Ashley Hackshaw

I don’t want my blog to become about cancer….but some days it takes over a little. I have to find the balance between creating and getting well. My mother has been a huge help. We took a trip to Clark’s today for some juicing and smoothie supplies. The goal is to make more nutritional food that my body can spend little to no energy digesting.

“Dr. Mom”….leaving notes everywhere:

My hair is going to just be a few strands soon. It looks normal until you start inspecting closely. It’s falling out so evenly. All of my highlights are disappearing.

I had a nice offering to my little hummingbirds today. I hope too much hair doesn’t fly over to my neighbors yard. My friend Megan emailed me an excerpt from a book today about hummingbirds…..I wrote out a few parts that I loved:

The song of the Hummingbird awakens the medicine flowers. Hummer sings a vibration of pure joy.

If Hummingbird is your personal medicine you love life and its joys. Your presence brings joy to others. You join people together in relationships which bring out the best in them. You know instinctively where beauty abides and near or far your journey to your ideal. You move comfortably within a beautiful environment and help others taste the succulent nectar of life.

Beauty is the target, and Hummingbird’s mission is to spread joy or to be destroyed.

Spread joy!