The back of my head is bruised…so is my chin, lip and shoulder:
I have this pinched nerve in my upper back and last night about 2am I went to get some ice water in the kitchen. The last thing I remember is leaning on the counter to catch my breath (because it’s really hard work walking from the bedroom to the kitchen, right?)…….and next thing I knew I woke up on the floor.
What the heck? I decided to sleep on the floor? When was that a good idea…..
And….. for a second….. I thought about just going back to sleep…… on the floor. Then I spent 10 minutes trying to get OFF the floor…..because a pinched nerve automatically makes you an invalid. Then I went back to bed like nothing happened.
Mr. LBB woke up around 6:30am and said “Want to go to Keedy’s for breakfast?”
Me: Sure. But could you tell me how bad I look right now?
Mr. LBB: What?!
Me: I think I fell face first into the kitchen counter last night.
Mr. LBB: Do you think you have a concussion?
Me: No. But I wish we had security cameras…..that video would be classic.
……..and I feel like I’m missing another 5 minutes from my life. I wish I’d at least had a few drinks…..it would have made a better story.
In other news….Lisa (the chicken) laid an egg!
I feel like a proud parent.
And this…..
…….is how the universe keeps in balance.
Kristin S says
So sorry you fell but really glad you posted about it. I needed a laugh.
Now go eat breakfast.
Bev says
Yay Lisa! The chicken, but I am sure the other Lisa is also proud. Hope you feel better- pinched nerves are no fun.
Brandy says
Just take some make-up and make a black eye and then go to breakfast, put on a very sad face and everyone will think your husband did it….Then, when you get home you guys can have a really great laugh! Ps. Maybe you should add some corner protectors on the kitchen cabinets!! Hope you are feeling okay and your day gets better!
stephanie says
The same thing happened to my cousin… she actually had a mild concussion. She found out later that she had too much potasium (sp?) in system. She was overloading on vitamin C….
Glad you are still in one piece. Have a great weekend.
Amy Baldridge says
Yowza! Do you think you’ll go get your melon checked? Poor girl! And thanks for the giggle about the itchy fine china… my midget gets that sometimes when it’s hot, too… glad to know cortisone does the trick! I’ve shared that nickname with some of my friends & fam & they all crack up every time. One asked me why we don’t just call it what it is, and I had to tell her that it’s waaaaay more fun this way! 🙂
Lisa B. says
Okay, every time I think you have reached a new level in blogging (fine china) you send out another e-mail that just cracks me up even more. My husband is always telling me there is something wrong with me because I sometimes just seem to spontaneously fall down or trip over nothing. Now I have proof I’m not alone! You say everything out loud I only dare to think to myself!
Richard says
Sorry about your fall Ashley. My wife and I were at Keedy’s this morning and I didn’t see you……….Probably because we always park in front, (which is that?) and eat on the patio. Sat. at Keedy’s is an every week thing for us. Hope your bruises are better!
Tracy says
Hysterical but now I’m worried about you! Did you pass out?
christie says
I think I’m more worried about your blackout spell than you are.
??!!
Hope you are ok.
jan says
Get some arnica gel for your bruises, it will help them disappear faster.
Andrea Merrigan says
Wow…that sounds like a rough night. Maybe you were sleep walking! Hope it doesnt hurt to bad. Your posts always make me laugh, thanks.
Robin says
wow — what a night, glad that Your OK
xoxoxoxo <3
Denise says
Take it from a fellow klutz, arnica gel is AWESOME!
And I’m super glad you specified that it was Lisa, the chicken, because I was a little worried there for a second! It was like, “What, Lisa laid an egg? What the what? Oh wait, the chicken. Totally normal.”
Michelle says
Wowsers— not to sound like your Mom, even though I’m old enough to be… I would feel a lot better if you got yourself checked out. I just had spinal surgery because my nerves were so pinched. I never passed out…
Claudia says
Chin Up!
Andrea says
Oh pinched nerves are evil… E.V.I.L! awww man I feel for ya girly. They suck because you can feel 100% otherwise and just.cannot.move. Hope your day improved. 🙂 You still crackin’ me up though.
Nadja says
You need to lay off the donuts girl!
Randomly passing out at night and getting facial insures are the first sign of donut addiction 🙂 Hope you feel better soon!
Maybe you need to talk to Dr. L about it … the real one, not the plastic one!
I’d send Lisa’s egg over to cool your bruises but I ATE IT!!!
Karen C says
Heal fast, that sure was a shock to your system. Glad you did make it back to bed, imagine the horror if they found you on the floor in the morning? I have nerve damage and my right foot is half numb, so I fear loose gravel as one piece of it can send me down now. I live on a gravel road with a gravel driveway. I’ve had to not walk much anymore and I do not drive. And I can’t hop on my left foot two miles into town though I wish some days I could. Cool about the egg! Not the one on your head, the real chicken egg.
Kati says
Ouch! But YAY for Chicken Lisa! 🙂
Chelle Chapman says
You’re so funny!! I’d have been milkin that fall for everything it was worth!
Me: “Sure, breakfast sounds yummy but since my fall in the kitchen last night, could you go get it & bring it home for me so I don’t have to get up, dressed, go out w/ bruises? Oh, & before you leave could you bring me my lappy, some coffee, help me to the potty, take the kids w/ you? (LOL, I dont even have kids in the house anymore), when you get back, would ya catch the dirty dishes, vacuum/mop, cuz that is what I was going to do today but……………since my fall……………….”. Like I said, or at least thought, You are such a Trooper!!!!! Always thinkin if ya!!
Teri says
You’re actually pretty lucky. The same thing happend to me and I woke up with a chin needing stitches and a broken jaw. The worst part of it all was it was the first night I’d gone to help my daughter with our first grandchild and I had to be shipped back home! I hope your not too sore!
Hang in there Ashley!
lisa says
I admire you!
Debi says
Just an FYI if your still taking the sleep meds, this can be a side effect or should I say hazard. Ambian can cause you to hallucinate and call random people in middle of night and Cymbalta causes sleep falling, my mom is a regular at the ER, this last time she broke a rib just trying to potty in her sleep. You might want to get your cavasa checked out if you start acting to normal. hehe 😉
Holly says
Woman, you better call your doc and get checked out. As awesome a video as that would be (since you are okay) it’s not really normal to just face plant on the counter for no reason. Also, OUCH! Holy crap that looks like it hurts. Be good to you, dangit. Until you heal up, maybe try some dermablend make up. It’s what the drag queens use for cover up and if it can make a dude look like a lady, I bet it can camo a bruise! 😛 Oh and yay for Lisa chicken’s first egg!!!
Pamela Bates/Bates Mercantile Co. says
i had an omelet yesterday and thought of you. it was only a one egg omelet so lisa will have to wait.
honestly woman, would ya please get the cameras installed so we can all enjoy a nice face plant next time?
Tleshia Farrar says
This exact thing happened to me except in the bathroom. My chin had a quarter sized BLACK as black could be bruise on it. It took almost 2 months to fully go away. All we can figure out is that a new medicine I was on lowered my blood pressure and it caused me to pass out and when I did I hit the corner of the vanity. I don’t remember any of it. My husband found me asleep on the floor right outside the bathroom door the next morning. BiZZZARRRROO!!!!
Lindsay says
Oh my stars. I just love you and all your words.