Nothing is More Real than Nothing

All I wanted to know was how to live in it. Maybe if you found out how to live in it you learned from that what it was all about.
― Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises

The honest truth: tonight I have complete writer’s block. I have been sitting here watching a blinking cursor for the last hour and the clock just keeps ticking by.  On December 31st when I thought “oh 31 days of JOY is a great idea!” I guess I didn’t fully think it through that I was committing to 31 days of writing. It sounded like a perfectly good idea at the time.

I walk outside for a moment and gaze at the sky: pitch black. nothing. I take a picture: pitch black. nothing. I go over my day: nothing. A few years ago I’d be crying over my keyboard at this point. I would be overflowing with frustration and doubt. But now I know that this is just a gap.  These are the times that I just ask for grace and accept that I may have over-committed…just a little. 

And so I sit here…slowly sucking the salt of of one pretzel stick at a time….and another hour has ticked by.

I think about dinner and how Mr. LBB asked Boo what an adjective was. She replied: Something that makes it much harder to read. I asked my mom if angels can see us naked.  She said: yes.

I grab the first book I can reach without getting up: Travels with Charley by John Steinbeck. And open it up to the middle: page 106.

A man with nothing to say has no words. Can its reverse be true – a man who has no one to say anything to has no words has he has no need for words?

I think my mind just broke.

There’s that saying: Nothing is more real than nothing.  So that’s something. Nothing makes me have to mind the gap. That means packing it up tonight and stepping back out in faith tomorrow. Faith strengthens joy. And find the good: I did manage to take my one photo for today’s “Me” photo challenge.  So that’s something too:

Something.

The Year of Joy Recap:

Day 1: The Year of Joy: You are deserving of joy. Many times we confuse joy with happiness. They are two separate things. Happiness comes from circumstances, but joy is an attitude that defies circumstances.

Day 2: A Bigger Target: Focus changes everything. Our goal in life should be to be much, not to have much.

Day 3: Make Room for Joy: Quit Something Every Thursday: So how do we become deep people? Don’t let time fillers dilute your life, intrude and thin out your joy.

Day 4: Availability is the Greatest Ability: I so often think I’m available, but really my mind is wandering around in the margins of life.

Day 5: People Gifting Cadillacs: So many lessons to learn in letting go. As well as giving and gifting. Some are so grateful to find a great treasure at any cost.